As the Marcapolo pumped swiftly across the Niger bridge heading towards Asaba, it's sound re-echoed against the metal struts and pylons like peeling plaster off a wall. Except for Lily- the lady by my side and myself, most of the other commuters were already asleep.
Lily was chic, her phone illuminated face shone with artistic strokes of mascara, painted fingernails clawed out like talon as she kept skimming through her large mobile device- a five-and-a-half inches Samsung tablet. I couldn't help but peep with dismay at the explicit web contents she was browsing over in her posh Tablet.
Shocked and confused, I decided to engage her in a conversation.
"Phones have really revolutionized the world", I quipped. She instantly turned to me, nodded and sank back into the phone.
"You need one of those?" I asked pointing to the various phalluses displayed across her screen. They were diverse colours and assorted shapes of Rabbits, Butterflies, Pocket rockets and Magic wands.
"Kinda, Yea!", she answered flashing her 'Nigerian-made American ascent', the type that turns all vowels into nasals and creates a lisp with the consonants.
"I'm tryna get maself a newer one", she'd continued, her pallid eyes jammed unto the screen.
"You had an old one before now?", I demanded more. The luminescence from the mobile device genuflected a naughty smile that flew across her painted face momentarily, and disappeared. She adjusted, half-turning towards my direction, then she started to explain in low tones.
"You see, I'd an older toy. Buhari- dah waz de name I gave it. A very good piece-of-shit, it could 'fuck-dah-livin-day- lights-outta-yur". It's broken now, I guess over-use and old age did it in, if-yur-get-wah-am-sayin", she finished with her Oyibo ascent.
"Owkay, So you'll be needing a replacement for, what did you call it... Buhari, right? You ordering it online?", I followed her drift.
"Nope! Was juz runnin catalogues, so I can shoot for a better vib. Somethin' modern and smarter- if-yur-get-wah-am-sayin. Buh, I'll buy from a sextoy shop when I geh tuh Lagos", she pipped.
O! I see. But what do you need a vibrator for? Don't you have a man? I quizzed in a final attempt to engage her.
"Me? She asked back.
"Oh no! U don't gerrit. I don't do men, I'm a lesbian, she answered winking coquettishly.
The bus swerved momentarily, swaying me towards her and then away to the window frames. I turned, slide the glass open and felt the night breeze waft strongly across my face.
By morning, we will be in Lagos and maybe Lily will be able to get herself another Buhari- some vibrator that 'fucks-tha-livin-day-light-out'o her'.
©Poet Razon-Anny Justin
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